Speechless

im sitting here.. Beside the pool, straing at there.. Far far away.. Im empty.. I dont know what i feel..
I just wanna cry now.. i dont even know the reason i feel this..this just a feel.. When you lost someone you love..
I feel nothing.. Feel like i just spending too much time feeling this,.
Ok. i wanna say im not okay,
i pretend to be okay.. Yap.. I pretend to be okay.. But i feel its just a ******* i
I dont wanna do this anymore.. My deeds feel just like useful..
Im speechless now.. :'(
My decision is already made.
Astrid.. You can do it. No matter what..
Ure strong girll =]
Theres no apology anymoree...
Its ur decision..
So stand for it and smile for it..

Have a very bright day pals!
Love you all